Va de disparates (por estudiantes de ESO)

Algunas burradas que algunos alumnos de ESO ponen en los exámenes. En este caso están referidas a la Historia y Geografía, en el sistema educativo actual compiladas y fundidas en el área de Sociales, o mejor Conocimiento del área Natural y Social. Para nosotros Historia se escribe con mayúscula y para estos estudiantes es con minúscula. Nos referimos a esa disciplina en la que todo es posible, en la que se puede decir cualquier cosa, todo es válido: ¿quién lo va a comprobar?
Los disparates que vienen a continuación han sido recogidos y publicados por J. Serrano y J. Reboredo en su libro Historia de España contada por estudiantes. Esta referencia tiene su base en la revista Carrollia, en el número 91, correspondiente a diciembre de 2006.


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-Una de las principales manifestaciones del arte gótico fueron las pirámides, que como todo el mundo sabe, son apuntadas.
-A partir del Concilio de Trento el matrimonio cristiano debía ser consumado en presencia de un sacerdote.
-Despotismo ilustrado: los reyes tenían todo el poder, pero tenían que obedecer cuando el pueblo se ponía de acuerdo entre ellos.
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-Franco era el rey que había antes de Juan Carlos I.
-España no participó en la Segunda Guerra Mundial porque Hitler tenía miedo de Franco.
-Franco fue un político dictador que consiguió imponer durante el reinado de Felipe II un régimen dictatorial.
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-Democracia: es cuando hay gente que mata otra gente o cuando un país echa bombas a otro o se pegan unos a otros; pues esto es democracia.
-Cartografía: las faltas de ortografía.
Un paralelo es una de aquellas líneas que dividen la Tierra en trozos, pero es imaginario.
-Continente: partículas de tierra donde vivimos nosotros.
-Anticiclón: es la temperatura caliente y se mide en milibares.
-Cátedra: pensión o escuela para los que querían ser curas.
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-Desarrollo sostenible: es el desarrollo que no es ni alto ni bajo, es decir, es mediano.
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-Principales cultivos españoles: la uva, que produce el gran aceite que se fabrica en España.
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-La pintura al fresco consiste en pintar al aire libre.
-Sufragista quiere decir que siempre está navegando por los mares.
-La Guerra Fría se caracteriza por matar gente a sangre fría.
-Hambre endémica es la que pasa cuando hay epidemias.
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